Perpetual Thursday Ramblings, Rantings, Nonsense, and Bunk
How about "The Orange Oaf?"
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Well, once again I've managed to go for while without posting anything, and then suddenly come back with a complete overhaul of Perpetual Thursday's template. This time, however, I've finally got it to where I am truly, completely happy with it. It's big, it's flexible, it's clean, it's awesome. I'm very happy with it.
Now, I promised in my last post that I would have some witty commentary lined up for this post, and, as much as possible, I do not disappoint. So, without further ado, I want to talk about the Orange Order. More specifically, I want to talk about their new superhero: ORANGE MAN!
From the BBC:
"Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's... well he doesn't have a name yet, but the Orange Order hopes to win a new generation of fans with their own superhero.
The origins of the Orange Order may date from the 17th century battle for supremacy between Protestantism and Catholicism, but they have high hopes for this 21st century makeover.
King William has been an Orange icon for more than 300 years, but it seems the curly wig and pointed hat combo were not doing it for the kids any more.
While the unnamed character still sports a sash, the traditional bowler hat has been replaced by a trendy purple cape."
Read the full article...
Now, originally I had simply intended to give some kind of witty commentary on the order (probably with some little jab like, "silly protestants, tricks are for kids"), but after giving it some thought, I realized that this pretty much speaks for itself. So, rather than come up with as many silly names for him as I could (the Orange Oaf was the only really good one I could come up with), I've decided to create a couple of helpers for Capitan Citrus: the Anglican Avengers!
The Rump Ranger
I was originally going to call this fellow "Gay Man," but that's a bit overdone, so I went with the Rump Ranger Instead. He's the teams fashion expert - designing the costumes and fixing the hairstyles.
He might also be the Tangerine Tomfool's domestic parter, but no one is sure. After all, we're not supposed to know their secret identities.
His theme song is a show tune. His special power is the "gay ray." Or perhaps the "gay-zer," whichever sounds more idiotic.
The Heritic
I went over a lot of different names for this fellow, and I'll admit that this wasn't my first choice. However, "Super Satan" sounded really, really bad. So I went with this one.
He's the reluctant, bad-guy helper. He seldom agrees with Power Pumpkin up there, and they often get into it with each other. However, in the end, the share the same common goal: leading souls away from the Catholic Church. So, when they need to, they can put aside their differences and work together.
His theme music is "Enter Sandman" by Metallica. His super power is his "magikal" bow, which which he shoots "atheist arrows."
Well, that's as far as I'm willing to take this joke - however, if you can come up with your own additions to the team (pictures not necessary if you don't want to do em'), please comment and let me know!
Labels: Religion
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